1. Change your attitude about failing
- Be mindful of your own responses to mistakes and failure. Talk about what you’ve learned, and be willing to pick yourself up and try again.
- Encourage and celebrate your child’s mistakes as learning experiences.
2. Emphasize effort, not the ability
- Emphasize effort (and the process) over ability (and the outcome)
- When they struggle, discuss specific strategies that might work next time
3. Demonstrate Unconditional Love
Make it clear that you love your child unconditionally, even when they make mistakes or use poor judgment
4. Conduct the “Worst-case scenario” exercise
- Start by grabbing a piece of paper so you can brainstorm together with your child.
- Ask them questions like: “if it all goes wrong, what’s the worst thing that could happen”
5. Help them focus on the solution
- Discuss what actions they took, the consequences of these actions, and how these consequences can be avoided in the future.
- Ask questions like: ” What when wrong?”, “How can you fix or prevent this next year?”.
6. Have conversations about success and failure
- Talk about success using the “iceberg analogy.”
- Explain that when you see successful people, you only see the tip of the iceberg. you don’t see what’s “under the water,”: failures, rejection, frit, effort, discipline, persistence, etc.
